Disgusting incidents

[enigma]

well ur futuristic plan is ideal in a eutopic world. some things are deep rooted in society. i will give u an instance of how eve teasing is percieved. i was sittin with a fren o mine on the road and he was eve teasing this gal and i asked him what pleasure does he get out of it. and the reply i got was that the girl feels important when she is eve teased.

Well maybe in this case that u are referring to, the girl might have felt important being teased, but i can assure u she would have felt disgusted and humiliated to be spat upon



Coming to the issue of the futuristic plan its not impossible to implement as moral education which u urself are harping about should be the most appropriate thing to be done to revise such behavioural patterns. Moral edu covers teaching children and for that matter college students to behave properly and to have a healthy interaction amongst themselves following a certain code of ethics so do u think moral edu does not cover my futuristic plan?



Basically we all feel the same its not in a day or in a year we can eliminate such a menace, but definitely start off by inculcating moral sense in the people surrounding us that would help the larger objective which i had been reiterating from the beginning.

[solosynergy]

well ur futuristic plan is ideal in a eutopic world. some things are deep rooted in society. i will give u an instance of how eve teasing is percieved. i was sittin with a fren o mine on the road and he was eve teasing this gal and i asked him what pleasure does he get out of it. and the reply i got was that the girl feels important when she is eve teased.

Well maybe in this case that u are referring to, the girl might have felt important being teased, but i can assure u she would have felt disgusted and humiliated to be spat upon

Coming to the issue of the futuristic plan its not impossible to implement as moral education which u urself are harping about should be the most appropriate thing to be done to revise such behavioural patterns. Moral edu covers teaching children and for that matter college students to behave properly and to have a healthy interaction amongst themselves following a certain code of ethics so do u think moral edu does not cover my futuristic plan?

Basically we all feel the same its not in a day or in a year we can eliminate such a menace, but definitely start off by inculcating moral sense in the people surrounding us that would help the larger objective which i had been reiterating from the beginning.

i am not saying that the gal felt important being teased. its just that she got so very used to it. and about the moral education thing all i can see is that it will be discussed on DBs like this but never really get into the class room. do u think we as citiziens of this country have the power to change things for instance the moral education thing ?

[CtrlAltDel]

...the reply i got was that the girl feels important when she is eve teased.

How does he know? Did she tell him?

no, the hero of the last movie he saw told him

[Reality,,its here.Accept it.]

hmmmm, interesting turn the discussion is taking. now we are down to moral education. well i have my ideas about the whole issue which many people might not suscribe to but still i guess this is the place to express them.( frankly , i am impressed by the discussions here, open ended and frank.)

Morals are something intrinsic a person needs to have ,, u might try to teach them at school but it depends on how much they are supplemented at home. so here we have a situation where the family , education system and the society at large, are equally important in moulding a child's morals. They will be no benefit if the kid is taught all possible good morals at school but goes out of the school and sees that none of them apply in real life. kids do have a very observant nature. what we see leaves a more lasting impression on our minds than what we are told or read, so imagine what a child goes thru.

This post maybe irrelavent to the "spitting incident" but is relavent to the discussion about moral standards.

And about the girl's remark about feeling odd at not being noticed, that is quite natural. everyone feels that, guys and girls. its human mentality,we crave attention ,,and sure it feels good to be noticed. but the point to notice is that --- she missed ATTENTION NOT ABUSE. who doesnt like attention, we all do, no matter what and who we are. so we as guys shouldnt misinterpret it as to mean that girls like being teased. Simple people , just think of one person whom u know who likes to be teased. do u find any takers? Notice i said teased and nothing about being noitced.(TEASING IS NOT EQUAL TO BEING NOTICED). i think people can make that simple conclusion.

[enigma]

What sorts of things are good?' Or 'What does "good" mean? does it start at school or at home?? a child has his morals in place (subconsiously) by the time he attends school thats what my friend said and i totally agree with him.



I have seen students having moral science as a subject in school behaving in a way later in life not socially or morally accepted by society so morals can be taught ,but they would be followed is not certain.



Moral standards are not absolute, but instead emerge from social customs and other sources. Morality is taken to refer to a universal code of conduct that would be followed by all rational persons. No one thinks it is morally justified to cheat, deceive, injure, or kill someone simply in order to gain sufficient money to take a fantastic vacation.



Every human has a certain set of moral values embedded its just the degree that differs. We as citizens can invoke those values using different techniques we can lead by example, or by being verbal about our opinions and thoughts. i spread a word regarding this issue at my place of work people listened and they in turn would tell the next 10 they would come in contact with so we can make a difference (at least it got them thinking)

[solsoynergy]

hmmmm, interesting turn the discussion is taking. now we are down to moral education. well i have my ideas about the whole issue which many people might not suscribe to but still i guess this is the place to express them.( frankly , i am impressed by the discussions here, open ended and frank.)
Morals are something intrinsic a person needs to have ,, u might try to teach them at school but it depends on how much they are supplemented at home. so here we have a situation where the family , education system and the society at large, are equally important in moulding a child's morals. They will be no benefit if the kid is taught all possible good morals at school but goes out of the school and sees that none of them apply in real life. kids do have a very observant nature. what we see leaves a more lasting impression on our minds than what we are told or read, so imagine what a child goes thru.
This post maybe irrelavent to the "spitting incident" but is relavent to the discussion about moral standards.
And about the girl's remark about feeling odd at not being noticed, that is quite natural. everyone feels that, guys and girls. its human mentality,we crave attention ,,and sure it feels good to be noticed. but the point to notice is that --- she missed ATTENTION NOT ABUSE. who doesnt like attention, we all do, no matter what and who we are. so we as guys shouldnt misinterpret it as to mean that girls like being teased. Simple people , just think of one person whom u know who likes to be teased. do u find any takers? Notice i said teased and nothing about being noitced.(TEASING IS NOT EQUAL TO BEING NOTICED). i think people can make that simple conclusion.

i do agree with what u have said. very smart of u to have pointed out the difference between being teased and noticed. well the imbibing of moral standards into school is one step i can think of. yes kids are very observant but then the number of ppl with better morals would be on the rise.At lease a step in the positive direction than nothin else.

[CtrlAltDel]

a good step wud be to encourage friendship between kids of opposite sexes. unfortunately many parents try their hardest not to allow their kid to get close to children of opposite sex.



as i said in a previous post kids who grow up with minimum contact with opposite sex could have wrong notions. for instance boys might feel that "eve-teasing" is the best way to impress/attract girls...

[Reality,,its here.Accept it.]

well i think interaction between sexes is fine.

But again i have an observation to make, i have a lot of friends from sainik school, the place where there are only guys in a residential setup for 6 yrs of their schooling life. i noticed that they have a healthy respect towards girls and dont tease or abuse them. and i know people from very progressive co-ed schools who have the worst attidute towards girls.

so i have my reservations as to if this is the real problem.

one more very valid observation is ,about guys who have sisters indulging in these kind of activites...and surprisingly u will find a lot of them do have sisters. so........[/list][/code][/quote]

[lonewolf]

a good step wud be to encourage friendship between kids of opposite sexes. unfortunately many parents try their hardest not to allow their kid to get close to children of opposite sex.

as i said in a previous post kids who grow up with minimum contact with opposite sex could have wrong notions. for instance boys might feel that "eve-teasing" is the best way to impress/attract girls...

Thats correct. I grew up without differentiating my friends based on their gender and my parents never opposed my friendship with anybody. Maybe thats why I get along with people more easily than most of the others who had less contact with the opposite sex in their childhood or youth,



I find the concept of "eve-teasing" disgusting! Some of my non-Indian friends asked me what eve-teasing was (after reading incidents on Indian news websites), and when I explained it, they said "We call that sexual harassment here".

[solosynergy]

well i think interaction between sexes is fine.
But again i have an observation to make, i have a lot of friends from sainik school, the place where there are only guys in a residential setup for 6 yrs of their schooling life. i noticed that they have a healthy respect towards girls and dont tease or abuse them. and i know people from very progressive co-ed schools who have the worst attidute towards girls.
so i have my reservations as to if this is the real problem.
one more very valid observation is ,about guys who have sisters indulging in these kind of activites...and surprisingly u will find a lot of them do have sisters. so........[/list][/code]

[/quote]



its more of the environment that shud be conducive enough to make morals a part of the child. and that environment is in schools. yes interaction with the opposite sex does improve our sense of morals coz we get the opposites sex's perspective and learn to appreciate them and understand what offends them. but then morals dont just end with the oppsite sex.we shud at least take that as a begning.

[CtrlAltDel]

having co-ed schools may not solve the problem. its how the kids are brot up that matters. parents shudnt put a sense of superiority in boys over girls. they shud train their kids to respect the opposite sex and encourage them to mingle.

i have seen parents warn their boys against playing with girls saying that god will punish them etc. this is all sick!

[Lucifer]

Yes, I do not call that eve-teasing. That is sexual harassment.



Eve-teasing is actually harmless, if you went by the strict meaning of the word. It just means that you see a hot chick and do harmless things as ogling or whistling. The case reverses in Adam teasing.



I think it is a term, like ragging, that has been mis-interpreted or taken up wrong connotations over the years. Ragging is not any of those activites that we sometimes read in the newspapers. No. Ragging is just a method of introduction between the seniors and the freshers. It is a very harmless thing and those guys who have been through it in its purest form, like me, would definitely appreciate it.

[solosynergy]

having co-ed schools may not solve the problem. its how the kids are brot up that matters. parents shudnt put a sense of superiority in boys over girls. they shud train their kids to respect the opposite sex and encourage them to mingle.
i have seen parents warn their boys against playing with girls saying that god will punish them etc. this is all sick!

ok . all said and done.but as an individual can anyone come up with actions to make a difference.

[Realiity,,its here.Accept it.]

this is just an observation again ,, if atleast this discussion can make us and the people around us good parents who teach our children proper values,, i think 'arti' & 'enigma' have succeeded atleast a bit in their quest to make better citizens and humans for the future. ( i mention these 2 users becoz they provided the input and the direction respectively.)

[CtrlAltDel]

but as an individual can anyone come up with actions to make a difference.

for starters, i'll teach my son how to flirt with respect. flirting without respect is sexual harrassment or eve-teasing.

[The Jackal]

having co-ed schools may not solve the problem. its how the kids are brot up that matters. parents shudnt put a sense of superiority in boys over girls. they shud train their kids to respect the opposite sex and encourage them to mingle.
i have seen parents warn their boys against playing with girls saying that god will punish them etc. this is all sick!

Yup definetly co-ed schools never solve the problem.When I was in 7th/8th class I used to be the only "freak" who talked to girls.If the girls wanted to pass anything to the boys they used to do it through me and vice versa.And these boys were like this guy is shameless and stuff like that.

[Lucifer]

[quote="CtrlAltDel"][/quote]



Attaboy!

[The Jackal]

but as an individual can anyone come up with actions to make a difference.

for starters, i'll teach my son how to flirt with respect. flirting without respect is sexual harrassment or eve-teasing.

Like father like son. Thats what my dad did..... Took me aside and told me that i should have a minimum of 2 GF's and his record is 4 at a time.Still didnt beat it..... ..

[CtrlAltDel]

but as an individual can anyone come up with actions to make a difference.

for starters, i'll teach my son how to flirt with respect. flirting without respect is sexual harrassment or eve-teasing.

Like father like son. Thats what my dad did..... Took me aside and told me that i should have a minimum of 2 GF's and his record is 4 at a time.Still didnt beat it..... ..

i'll start passing to him all my knowledge n experience when i think he's old enuf to handle it!

let him go thru the "i hate girls" phase that almost all young boys go thru first...

[solosynergy]

but as an individual can anyone come up with actions to make a difference.

for starters, i'll teach my son how to flirt with respect. flirting without respect is sexual harrassment or eve-teasing.

Like father like son. Thats what my dad did..... Took me aside and told me that i should have a minimum of 2 GF's and his record is 4 at a time.Still didnt beat it..... ..

i'll start passing to him all my knowledge n experience when i think he's old enuf to handle it!
let him go thru the "i hate girls" phase that almost all young boys go thru first...

what about the morals

[lonewolf]

having co-ed schools may not solve the problem. its how the kids are brot up that matters. parents shudnt put a sense of superiority in boys over girls. they shud train their kids to respect the opposite sex and encourage them to mingle.

I studied in a boy's school from 1st to 12th, and then in Wesley Boy's Degree College, and later on studied my MCA in Loyola Academy. So it was technically "boys-only" all the way. But I feel that the environment at home is more important (depends on how close you are with your parents/family). Being in a co-ed school is just one part, but the general environment (home, locality, circle of friends) counts a lot.

i have seen parents warn their boys against playing with girls saying that god will punish them etc.

Hahaha Reminds me of how the "fathers" in Loyola used to punish students (undergrad and grad) if they talk to students of the opposite sex for more than a few minutes

[Reality,,its here.Accept it.]

well here is a small rejoinder for CAD esp...

the meanings of flirt...



flirt : ( P ) Pronunciation Key (flûrt)

v. flirt·ed, flirt·ing, flirts

v. intr.

To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures.

To deal playfully, triflingly, or superficially with: flirt with danger.

To move abruptly or jerkily.



v. tr.

To toss or flip suddenly.

To move quickly.



n.

One given to flirting.

An abrupt jerking movement.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Origin unknown.]

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flirty adj.

Synonyms: flirt, dally, play, toy, trifle

These verbs mean to deal lightly, casually, or flippantly with someone or something: flirted with the idea of getting a job; dallying with music; can't play with life; toyed with the problem; a person not to be trifled with.



Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary.



flirt :v. i.

1. To run and dart about; to act with giddiness, or from a desire to attract notice; especially, to play the coquette; to play at courtship; to coquet; as, they flirt with the young men.

2. To utter contemptuous language, with an air of disdain; to jeer or gibe. [Obs.] --Beau. & Fl.

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary.



flirt, a. Pert; wanton. [Obs.]

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary.



flirt, v. t. [imp. & p. p. Flirted; p. pr. & vb. n. Flirting.] [Cf. AS. fleard trifle, folly, fleardian to trifle.]

1. To throw with a jerk or quick effort; to fling suddenly; as, they flirt water in each other's faces; he flirted a glove, or a handkerchief.

2. To toss or throw about; to move playfully to and fro; as, to flirt a fan.

3. To jeer at; to treat with contempt; to mock. [Obs.]

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary.



flirt: n :

1: a seductive woman who uses her sex appeal to exploit men [syn: coquette, vamp, vamper, minx, tease, prickteaser] 2: playful behavior intended to arouse sexual interest [syn: flirting, flirtation, coquetry, dalliance, toying] v 1: talk or behave amorously, without serious intentions; "The guys always try to chat up the new secretaries"; "My husband never flirts with other women" [syn: chat up, dally, butterfly, coquet, coquette, romance, philander, mash] 2: behave carelessly or indifferently; "Play about with a young girl's affection" [syn: dally, toy, play]





Source: WordNet ® 2.0, © 2003 Princeton University



i hope this helps all the people who want to teach their sons how to 'flirt'.

[Mayavi Morpheus]

5 pages and still on topic

This should go down in history of FHDB as the first thread that never went off-topic, except ofcourse the Shameless PCB II thread, but thats a different category altogather.

[The Jackal]

5 pages and still on topic
This should go down in history of FHDB as the first thread that never went off-topic, except ofcourse the Shameless PCB II thread, but thats a different category altogather.

Oh yeah didnt notice it.We have the movie quote's thread too...

[CtrlAltDel]

i'll start passing to him all my knowledge n experience when i think he's old enuf to handle it!
let him go thru the "i hate girls" phase that almost all young boys go thru first...

what about the morals

the "respect" part i talked abt includes lessons on morals and proper behaviour with girls. dont worry i have covered all angles...



and Reality-ji, what was the point of that mini dictionary u put up here?