Parental Advisory : Explicit Content

[Kenny]

Kenny I swear to god.. if you ruin my Airplane Bathroom fantasy.. i will rip your nuts off with my bare hands....

A man traveling by plane was in urgent need of a restroom facility, but each time he tried, it was occupied. The flight attendant, aware of his predicament, suggested he use the attendants' Ladies' Room but cautioned him not to press any of the buttons.





There, next to the paper roll were four buttons marked respectively:

• WW
  


• WA
  


• PP
  


• ATR

Soon his curiosity got the best of him. He carefully pressed the WW button and immediately a gentle flush of Warm Water sprayed on his bare bottom. He thought, "Wow, these gals really have it nice." So, a little more boldly he pressed the WA button. Warm Air blew across his wet bottom and dried it comfortably. "Ah ha," he thought, "no wonder these women take so long in the bathroom with these kind of services." So he pushed the next button, PP, with anticipation. A soft disposable Powder Puff swung below him and dusted his bottom lightly with talc. "Man, this is great," he thought as he reached out for the ATR button..



When he awoke in the hospital, the morphine was just wearing off, so in confusion, he buzzed the nurse to find out where he was and what had happened. The nurse explained, "Yes, you must have been having a great time until you pushed the 'Automatic Tampon Removal' button."

[Kenny]

now that wasn't even funny, it was just plain sick



heh heh heh

[CtrlAltDel]

Badmash, u better not reveal any more of yr fantasies....

[Kenny]

i will rip your nuts off with my bare hands....

you were speakin' of rippin' ?


BTW, Mr. and Mrs. McCormick say hi!

:lol:

Badmash, u better not reveal any more of yr fantasies....

nooooooo this is fun!!!

[asli_badmash]

Gettting ripped by the ATR Ouch... That must hurt!

[azazel]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !



btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

[malakpetmasala]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.

but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

[akhilis2cool]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

[malakpetmasala]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

curiosity, my friend

[akhilis2cool]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

curiosity, my friend

kya kya karte logan.....

[malakpetmasala]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

curiosity, my friend

kya kya karte logan.....

maai be voich dekne ke liye gaya, magar waha kaun be loga nahi te.

[akhilis2cool]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

curiosity, my friend

kya kya karte logan.....

maai be voich dekne ke liye gaya, magar waha kaun be loga nahi te.

isiliye itna saaf tha

[malakpetmasala]

point taken: NEVER use the loo meant for ladies !

btw, isko kya bolenge? GMDanda?

well... even if u do... never press any bottons as long as u have ur butt naked.
but ... got to admit... they are much cleaner.

tumko kaise malum

curiosity, my friend

kya kya karte logan.....

maai be voich dekne ke liye gaya, magar waha kaun be loga nahi te.

isiliye itna saaf tha

hau shayad.

[azazel]

Gates in heaven



Eventually, Bill croaks and Satan is there to greet him. "Welcome Mr.

Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all

eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life.

Now, since I in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of

three places in which you'll be locked up forever."



Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor

souls are tormented and tortured. He then takes him to a massive

coliseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by

starving lions.



Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a beautiful

young blonde with an alluring look on her face, sitting at a table on

which there is a bottle of the finest wine.



To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation,

Bill says "I'll take this option."



"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan locks the

room after Bill. As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer. "That was

Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best place of

all!"



"That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan. "The bottle has a hole

in it and the girl hasn't!"



"What about the PC?"



"It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan. "And it's missing three keys,"



"Which three?"



"Control, Alt and Delete."

[born_to_be_mild]

^^^ that one reminds me of another joke about a crosswords fanatic who goes to hell and is shown into a massive library. it's stacked from floor to ceiling with the best, sharpest puzzles. almost drooling with prospective pleasure the guy walks to the librarian and says, quick, give me a pencil. she says, that's the hell of it - no pencils



aaaaarrrgghhhh!

[asli_badmash]

^^^ that one reminds me of another joke about a crosswords fanatic who goes to hell and is shown into a massive library. it's stacked from floor to ceiling with the best, sharpest puzzles. almost drooling with prospective pleasure the guy walks to the librarian and says, quick, give me a pencil. she says, that's the hell of it - no pencils
aaaaarrrgghhhh!

That was really MILD...

[born_to_be_mild]

i see i failed to make to cut-off for grossness, due to the complete lack of boobs, ass, copulating headless blondes or automated tampon removal, in my joke.



will try harder next time. pwomise

[CtrlAltDel]

i see i failed to make to cut-off for grossness, due to the complete lack of boobs, ass, copulating headless blondes or automated tampon removal, in my joke.
will try harder next time. pwomise

good! see, u r already improving in our company!

[born_to_be_mild]

i haven't been around a boy's club in a while. i'm going to have to get out those dirty jokes, spit on my hands, belch and join the fray.



it's a tragedy, but i've forgotten most of the true-blue gross jokes we used to stock up on in school. a convent education has only one thing going for it: the absolutely vile stuff you get to hear in the playground. but, i turned out to be a goody-two-shoes after all. looking forward to some serious un-learning

[akhilis2cool]

welkum to da club BTBM

thats how u shall be reffered to hence forth. or may be mildy at times.



- the cool lord

[born_to_be_mild]

thank you, akhilis2cool (i'll take your word on that).



of the two evils, i think i'd prefer btbm, mildy is too close to mildew. or is it just me? ~sigh it usually is

[Kenny]

Hey BTBM... welcome to the club.



So tell us about yourself.

[asli_badmash]

Welcome BTBM... I hope you like your stay here.

i haven't been around a boy's club in a while. i'm going to have to get out those dirty jokes, spit on my hands, belch and join the fray.

Firstly this aint a boy club... It just so happens that you find more of the guys here who are not gettting laid; so instead they tend to hang out @ FHDB while on the background working on some prospect. They disappear for a short while for the randevouz and then get back to work on other prospects and so goes the cycle.

it's a tragedy, but i've forgotten most of the true-blue gross jokes we used to stock up on in school. a convent education has only one thing going for it: the absolutely vile stuff you get to hear in the playground. but, i turned out to be a goody-two-shoes after all. looking forward to some serious un-learning

Dont worry about that.. we are here to school you in the vilest of vile stuff.. Also we do have a good balance of the sane with the insane. Time and again you will see a thread where you would truly like to spew some sense. But mostly its funny retorts and leg-pulling.



Before I joined FHDB was a goody two-shoes.. now I walk on three Legs. (:wink: If you get what I mean.) courtsey guruji. Who is guruji? Nothing moves on the board without his permission.



Oh.. by the way dont mind DQ. We keep him tied in the backyard. So if you hear him howl... just ignore him.

[born_to_be_mild]

hey yourself, kenny



something about myself? i'm suddenly reminded of those terrible interviews, where you're expected to compress your entire uneventful life into two (or three) lines of snappy philosophy.



i'll spare you the mind-numbing details and just stick to the vital stats: am 24, live in hyd, read books like they're going to catch fire any minute and i won't be able to finish them, my latest greatest music album is an assortment called bent (love it love it!), i have a dog called mac (a goofy black lab), and i write for a living.



so what do you do? besides bemoan the tragic (and repeated) demise of kenny, that is?

[born_to_be_mild]

thanks, badmash. i like it already!



that comment about the three legs took me right back to school, so muchas gracias. and yes, i have made my acquintance with guruji, and am fairly certain that he'll pick on my last post for further details on my vital stats



not telling, btw