Humor...or something like it.

by **Stingrae** » Sat May 29, 2004 12:22 am

.....can't let my thread diee.................

here's somethin in line wit CADman's sig....

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In a city park stood two beautiful statues, one female and the other male, both nude.

These two statues faced each other for many, many years (Naked, remember!).

Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said, "The two of you have been truly exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people that have visited the park over the years. I am hereby authorised by God to give you the greatest wish that can be bestowed on you. I grant you the gift of life - albeit as a limited offer. You have 30 minutes to do whatever your hearts desire."

And with that command, the two statues came to life.

They smiled at each other, slowly moved their limbs about in wonderment, looked all around and then at their own bodies and finally back at each other.

Still smiling they then ran to the nearby woods and dived behind a large bush.

The angel smiled to herself as she listened to the giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. Even angels knew of such things!

After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, looking extremely satisfied and wearing nothing but even bigger smiles than before.

Puzzled, the angel looked at her watch and said to them, "You still have fifteen minutes. Wouldn't you like to continue?"

The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"

"OH, YES!" the female statue replied. "But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I'll shit on it's head!"

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by **Habitual Perfectionist** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:14 am

***SPOILER NOTICE***

This post contains material not intended for weak hearts, politically correct minds and last but not the least, moderators. Please press your mouse button and drag it over the rest of the post to read it if you feel you can take it.

***END OF SPOILER NOTICE***

Two inmates escaped from a mental asylum. Being penniless and not knowing the ways of the world, they hit the road by themselves, walking as long as their feet could take; eating whatever was available on the way and sleeping wherever night broke. They finally reached a deserted expanse of land, which seemed never ending. Still, they ploughed along; hungry, tired and almost dead.

Suddenly, they came across the body of a dead cat

by **Habitual Perfectionist** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:19 am

***SPOILER NOTICE***

This post contains material not intended for weak hearts, politically correct minds and last but not the least, moderators. Please press your mouse button and drag it over the rest of the post to read it if you feel you can take it.

***END OF SPOILER NOTICE***

Two inmates escaped from a mental asylum. Being penniless and not knowing the ways of the world, they hit the road by themselves, walking as long as their feet could take; eating whatever was available on the way and sleeping wherever night broke. They finally reached a deserted expanse of land, which seemed never ending. Still, they ploughed along; hungry, tired and almost dead.

Suddenly, they came across the body of a dead cat. Guts thrown out, flies swarming all over it, half decomposed, the cat presented a sorry sight. One of the madmen wanted to eat it. The other one warned him that it might be bad for his stomach. But this guy didn't pay any heed to it and ate the dead cat. And they walked along.

Presently, the man who'd eaten the cat felt sick. He stopped, writhed in pain and puked out all he'd eaten. The other madman heaved a sigh of relief and said, "Thank God, hot food after so long.

Sorry guys for the last post. Was testing colors.

by **azazel** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:21 am

ab hasna shayad??

by **Habitual Perfectionist** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:22 am

Hosoge to achcha lagega mujhe

by **azazel** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:31 am

by **Habitual Perfectionist** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:34 am

tanku tanku

:lol:

by **azazel** » Sat May 29, 2004 2:36 am

ur welcome saaar

by **akhilis2cool** » Sat May 29, 2004 10:03 am

sorry HP bhai ...joke padke i cld only *PUKE*

by **Stingrae** » Sat May 29, 2004 10:05 am

saala idhar bhi spammin start kardiye kya....

by **akhilis2cool** » Sat May 29, 2004 10:07 am

welcome to spammer land

by **stingrae** » Sat May 29, 2004 11:16 am

a bit late for dat....i blive i'm part o d community now... :mrgreen:

by **Stingrae** » Sat May 29, 2004 11:31 am

i warned abt possible gender-biased "humor"...here goes... :shock:

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Who cares, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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why don't women play sports?

kitchen's not big enough

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why are women's feet so small?

so they can stand closer to the sink

________________________________

How many men does it take to open a beer??

None, the woman should already have it open by the time she brings it to him...

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Why did the woman cross the road?

~Who cares? The real question is, what the _ is she doing out of the kitchen?

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

~You don't have to tell her anything. You already told her twice.

Why don't women need watches?

~Cause there is a clock on the stove.

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Q: What do you do if your woman stands infront of the TV when you're watching the game?

A: Shorten the chain

______________________________

by **Stingrae** » Sat May 29, 2004 11:33 am

n d best one requires a seperate post...

i got a gun for my wife;......best trade i ever made.

by **azazel** » Sat May 29, 2004 8:25 pm

like an uncle of mine always sez: Tera future dark dikhra re..

by **LuBiN_yOo** » Sun May 30, 2004 8:20 am

Why did Saddam Hussain attack Kuwait?

He had a Mallu baby-sitter, who always used to say 'KEEP QUWAIT' 'KEEP QUWAIT'

LmAooooo.....

[quote]shut up shut up shut up[/quote]

by **Stingrae** » Sun May 30, 2004 7:23 pm

azazel wrote:like an uncle of mine always sez: Tera future dark dikhra re..

kyon baap? its not like i'm trollin these forums look for feminine/feminist company unlike certain members............... :mrgreen:

n Lubin....wts d deal wit ur posts n all those "quotes"? u dint get it rite even once...wts d deal girl? wt IS d deal?!!!

by **azazel** » Sun May 30, 2004 8:22 pm

Stingrae wrote:kyon baap? its not like i'm trollin these forums look for feminine/feminist company unlike certain members...............

hehe.. but feminists on the prowl may decide to bobbitize ya.. be CAREFUL :wink:

somehow dude, i feel like might look like ---> :mrgreen:

j/k

p.s: i love feminists, they're so cute :roll:

by **LuBiN_yOo** » Sun May 30, 2004 9:52 pm

Stringrae...wht dint i get ryt??

i am quotin ppl....

did any1 read FARENHEIT 451??

GrEEn CaRd FeVeR....LOL

by **CtrlAltDel** » Sun May 30, 2004 10:13 pm

Habitual Perfectionist wrote:...Sorry guys for the last post. Was testing colors.

ever tried the "preview" button...? unless 'corz u wanted to count++... :lol:

by **Stingrae** » Sun May 30, 2004 11:17 pm

LuBiN_yOo wrote:Stringrae...wht dint i get ryt??
i am quotin ppl....

did any1 read FARENHEIT 451??

GrEEn CaRd FeVeR....LOL

ur "quotes" are fine maa...'tis d code ur gettin wrong....those [quote] things at d end if done rite wud be better....try d Preview button as CAD bhai suggested....

by **LuBiN_yOo** » Mon May 31, 2004 3:46 am

OHHH...thnx fo enlightenin me...stringrae

but i still don get it...kinda slow 2day...CAD bhai..ahaha...i get it...dint get the count ++ part tho...

south side south side....we gonna set this partiee off ryt..

west side west side...we gonna set this partiee off ryt...

chi-town chi-town...we gonna show dem how we get down...

lmao...some guy msgd me...askin whtr m frm CHINA(chi-town)

by **Luv_u_too** » Mon May 31, 2004 10:01 am

wokay maa...must say ur posts hav dis tendency to be waaay vague thanks to d cApS-LoCK eFfECt u keep tryin n ur quote thingies at d bottom....but heck,who's complainin aye?:?

ur nick sounds chinese....AND also d first time i read it it looked like Lubing You....lubricatin wat?!:?

PS: i know its mean luvvin me :mrgreen:

by **sTingRaE** » Mon May 31, 2004 10:05 am

LuBiN_yOo wrote:OHHH...thnx fo enlightenin me...stringrae

and for chrissake girl....d name's Stingrae!!:?

by **LuBiN_yOo** » Mon May 31, 2004 10:11 am

arey yaar...mai ne toh sirf ek hi baar...caps lock ka effect try kiya..

jus to c how fast i cud do tht...1 min i think...

lmao...lubricatin...hmm....mayb i shud change my sn...

any suggestions??

yea...lub u lots... ;-)

hey...got ur name ryt the first tyme...tryin to type w/out lookin at the keyboard...soo mistakes toh hoingey...lol...(its fo this job i want)

***soo don cry no more...jus remembr the good tymes we had b4***

Humor...or something like it.

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