Whose line is it anyway

by **azazel** » Fri May 14, 2004 12:30 am

People are idiots - Scott Adams [creator of Dilbert]

by **vivek** » Fri May 14, 2004 2:16 pm

"President Bush and Vice President _ Cheney are scheduled to testify before the 9/11 commission. I guess right now they're finalizing the seating arrangements. Should Bush sit on Cheney's right knee or his left knee?" —Jay Leno

"We ought to thank President Bush. He made it a lot easier for people to do taxes this year. No job, no income tax this year." —Jay Leno

"President Bush earned $400,000 for his job as president last year. That's not really that much for being president when you think about it. But President Bush, he doesn't do it for the money, he does it for the eight months of vacation every year." —Jay Leno

"The other night, President Bush's press conference was pre-empted by 'American Idol.' You know the difference between President Bush and 'American Idol?' See, on 'American Idol,' the one with the most votes wins." —Jay Leno

by **popesmokesdope** » Fri May 14, 2004 2:42 pm

PSD: chai loge?

Alpha Male: nahi saab, mein chai nahin peetha.

PSD: Coffee?

Alpha Male: Coffee bhi nahin peetha, saab.

PSD: phir, peethe kya ho?

Alpha Male: Roaj subah Dhoodh, aur shamku daaroo.

PSD: :shock:

+

by **Happy Hyderabadi** » Fri May 14, 2004 8:02 pm

popesmokesdope wrote:...
Alpha Male: Roaj subah Dhoodh, aur shamku daaroo.
PSD: + +

What, What ... Which, Which ... White, White ... Feeding Bottle / W Bottle / Muntha?!

:roll:

by **CtrlAltDel** » Sat May 15, 2004 10:11 am

Who would have ever thought that more naked pictures would come out under the Bush administration than under the Clinton administration?

-Jay Leno (refering to the Iraqi prison fotos)

In Iraq, terrorists are now firing missiles from donkey carts and working on plans for suicide donkeys. I guess these are the high-tech weapons President Bush was talking about...suicide donkeys - now would that be 'weapons of ass destruction'?

-Jay Leno

CNN said that after the war, there is a plan to divide Iraq into three parts ... regular, premium and unleaded.

-Jay Leno

Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate.

-Jay Leno

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

-Jay Leno

by **Jaszalcatraz** » Sat May 15, 2004 3:44 pm

Violence is the most fun thing to watch - QT

by **azazel** » Sun May 16, 2004 10:36 pm

more QT--> on Friends :

" I was the director of the first-ever episode. it started out with 25 guys/gals u see.. i trimmed 'em down to 6 by the end of that episode"

by **ilayaraja_fan** » Sun May 16, 2004 10:49 pm

I thought some of the best one liner's were from Yogi Berra - who played for the Yankees ( grrrr...damn those yankees :evil:

), known as yogi'isms. To quote some of 'em:

"Never answer an anonymous letter"

" I usually take a two hour nap from one to four"

" It's deja vu all over again"

" When you come to a fork in the road....Take it "

by **LP_Fan** » Mon May 17, 2004 2:14 am

azazel wrote:more QT--> on Friends :
" I was the director of the first-ever episode. it started out with 25 guys/gals u see.. i trimmed 'em down to 6 by the end of that episode"

I thought the best line uttered in that Jay Leno special was the one by David Duchovny:"You know the pool which they dance in the beginning,yeah.....I peeed in it."

by **Stingrae** » Mon May 17, 2004 9:05 pm

Early to bed n early to rise keeps a man healthy,wealthy n wise. - some dead guy.

by **azazel** » Mon May 17, 2004 11:48 pm

"Remember there's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over" - FZ

by **CtrlAltDel** » Tue May 18, 2004 10:11 am

Stingrae wrote:Early to bed n early to rise keeps a man healthy, wealthy n wise.

....and bored... :roll:

by **akhilis2cool** » Tue May 18, 2004 10:27 am

Take life one nap at a time - Garfield

by **Ajju** » Fri May 21, 2004 1:00 am

Hi all,

while on Garfield, some more lines(rather thoughts, as he supposedly never speaks):

"In a perfect world, chocolate wud b diet food"

U know u r overweight when:

"u have to use the scales used to weigh trucks"

"u have to wear a watch on each hand because ur body is so huge , it is in two diff. time zones"

by **Happy Hyderabadi** » Fri May 21, 2004 8:29 am

Bottles, Bottles and Bottles of Life...! Feeding Bottle / Milk Bottle / Medicine Bottle / Muntha OR W Bottle!

:roll:

by **ilayaraja_fan** » Fri May 21, 2004 12:24 pm

Hawkeye Pierce to Frank Burns on MASH "Frank, u r the 10 most boring ppl I have ever seen"

by **Stingrae** » Fri May 21, 2004 7:33 pm

"Wait, stop! We can outsmart those dolphins. Don't forget: we invented computers, leg warmers, bendy straws, peel-and-eat shrimp, the glory hole, *and* the pudding cup!" - Homer Simpson

by **CtrlAltDel** » Fri May 21, 2004 8:02 pm

Don't keep blaming yourself all the time. Blame yourself once and move on...

-Homer Simpson

by **azazel** » Sun May 23, 2004 1:55 am

"Behind every great fortune there is a crime" - Balzac

by **Johnny** » Sun May 23, 2004 2:20 am

If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out

by **Johnny** » Sun May 23, 2004 2:25 am

When spider webs unite, they can tie up a lion. -- Ethiopian Proverb

by **azazel** » Sun May 23, 2004 2:26 am

An unfulfilled vocation drains the color from a man's entire existence - Balzac

by **Stingrae** » Sun May 23, 2004 3:39 pm

It is easierto fight for one's principles than to live up to them.

there are 3 kinds of ppl in dis world,

d ones who make things happen,

d ones who watch things happen,

d ones who wunder wat the hell happened.

by **rock_26iin** » Sun May 23, 2004 4:19 pm

Calvin's mom[to Calvin] : "If I haven't seen you for two minutes, I figure there is trouble."

by **rock_26iin** » Sun May 23, 2004 4:36 pm

Calvin:"I think night time is so dark so that you can imagine your fears with less distraction."

"The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret." - Henny Youngman

"Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished"

"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight." - Phyllis Diller

"Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe"

Whose line is it anyway

What, What ... Which, Which ... White, White ...!

Bottles, Bottles and Bottles of Life...!

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